According to Wikipedia, "Respect denotes both a positive feeling of esteem for a person or other entity (such as a nation or a religion), and also specific actions and conduct representative of that esteem. Respect can be a specific feeling of regard for the actual qualities of the one respected (e.g., "I have great respect for her judgment"). It can also be conduct in accord with a specific ethic of respect. Rude conduct is usually considered to indicate a lack of respect, whereas actions that honor somebody or something indicate respect".
It has been going on for some time..rather its been brewing. To me respect has got to be earned!
Some people have been demanding for this and that...rightly so if you are the boss...but if you are not well, that's a different piece of cake. No matter who you are, what position you are in, you have to consider other people's feelings when dispensing orders or making requests. Human beings all have feelings, people have dignity and people all want some respect. You want people to respect you, you have got to respect other people first. Office politics is one thing, running down people is another. Me, I am not game for with one.
To me, it has always been my policy. When it comes to work, nothing less than the best is expected and quality should never be compromised...even though some things happen beyond our control at times, or when we let our guard down for a minute. I often tell my staff, where work is concerned, we must give our best at all times, we must take our work seriously and take pride in our work. After office hours, we can always pop out for food and drinks and be pals. Then for a while we can enjoy ourselves and inculcate good friendships. Sometimes, we find it hard to differentiate the two...that of boss and subordinate and between friends. But somehow...that is understood in silence.
What is most important is that, at no time should we make anyone feel uncomfortable in public or in the presence if somebody else. We want people to respect us, we must earn their respect too. Orders or tasks can be given in a clear manner..without barking at them, nor bringing anyone down. People should not be made small...but happy to carry out their tasks. People are willing to work, give them a chance to prove themselves. If there are mistakes, these can be corrected...and the person given a talking to, but no one should be made to feel so small and incompetent that they feel their dignity and respect has all but stripped away. No one wants to fail...no one plans to fail...a good leader ensures that. A good leader must ensure he or she has followers...that there is empowerment...a good leader must also lead by example, must also show how it is done...instead of just asking the subordinates to do it..and finding fault with it later. Intsructions given must be clear and most important, trust people to do it. make them believe they can do it and praise them for a job well done.
So all in all, give respect if we want to be respected in return. Nothing beats a happy family working environment. It is said, people don't care till they know how much you care.
Hey you out there...it's ok to love and be loved!
Cheers.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Some things you can't explain...or better left unsaid...
ya..what's this all about? Yes. I've been asking myself the same question this past weekend. What the heck is wrong with some people...at work, at home...or is it me? Just when you think you've done the right things, someone disagrees and worse still put you down. Just when you think life is all chummy yummy, someone does and thinks otherwise. Wow, that really makes you sit up and ponder. Why do I have to put up with this? I get up at 5 every morning, see that the kids and the maid are up...see the kids off to school...leave the house by 6.15am, drop my son off at college and by 7.15am , I'm at the office...you ask me why i go to the office so early...used to be earlier, at the office by 7am, now i have to drop my son, so there's some diversion there, well, I dont want to be stuck in the crazy morning work jam. Anyway, I prefer to sit down quietly and plan for the day. It's quiet time for me and the ideas can flow. Staff drift in and most come in by 8.30am. The day will quickly rush by...meetings, discussions...reports etc..and before you know it, it's 5pm...what a long day it has been. Suffice to say, if there's no meeting, I get to start my long journey home, again I want to beat the traffic jam home. One wonders, some days when it rains, or I leave the office late, it means two to three hours on the road home. That's when I reach home completely exhausted and worn out. That leaves me with little quality time with my family since the mood is gone and tiredness takes over. Over the past two years since I moved to my new place, it has been one of mixed feelings, comfort and satisfaction yet frustration at htimes cos of the distance from work. But most of that feeling has been replaced by one of acceptance of things that are and also the fact that, i still have family with me. That should keep me happy and contented. ya, some feelings you just can't explain and don't have to.
Then again, a quick nightly check of the office email is a must...just in case some colleaques need something or you have to edit a report or provide input for somebody who needs it. All in a day's work. It should be comprehensible by now, family, work...it's so closely intertwined, I can't really say i have been successful in dividing the two. To me, they seem to complement each other. I expect to bring office work home and so do my family. Everyone's got their own work and responsibilities. Some may say, leave the office work at the office...i guess i am one of those who can't, unless I have family commitments elsewhere, i mean out of state etc. If not, I guess I am available 24/7.
I wish things like family relationships can be as easy as it looks. Some things you can't explain, why some people react differently to what one sibling is saying or doing. A simple statement or email can be so wrongly interpreted by someone else, its hard to fathom. But I guess I won't try to find out why ...let things be...let them have their say and for me, better to leave things unsaid. Cos words once spoken cannot be taken back. Then there will be the awkwards moments when you meet cos of what has passed between, either face to face or via email. Some siblings don't talk to one another etc...I guess it happens in every household at some time or other. It happens in mine, now and then. But blood is thicker than water..and soon all will be well again. I mean how long can one keep the grudges, how long can one feel the hurt and the anger, as long as it takes you say, well, yes time heals they say, but to forgive and forget is another. At any rate, suffice to say, I won't be losing any sleep on it cos' my conscience is clear... some days, it's easier to just forget and not say anything about it at all. In this case, I really can't figure out or explain it and so I am leaving it at that! Well, then again, some things are better left unsaid.
Office politics is another thing I won't be drawn into. There's the usual gossip and I will not be drawn into it. I try to do my best and expect others to do theirs as well. I also expect that work done must be completed on time and done correctly at the first time. I also expect meetings to be planned in advance and executed accordingly. I also expect respect and decorum shown during meetings where and when it should be accorded. at any time, the chairman of a meeting must be accorded proper respect. Out of the office, it's different, one can be friends I often say outside the office but during office hours, there must be respect shown, a superior and co-worker and staff under your supervision. I just hope everyone realises this without it being displayed or talked about.
Well, that was my week. I am looking forward to what's in store..since the Boss is back.
Have a good week.
Cheers!
Then again, a quick nightly check of the office email is a must...just in case some colleaques need something or you have to edit a report or provide input for somebody who needs it. All in a day's work. It should be comprehensible by now, family, work...it's so closely intertwined, I can't really say i have been successful in dividing the two. To me, they seem to complement each other. I expect to bring office work home and so do my family. Everyone's got their own work and responsibilities. Some may say, leave the office work at the office...i guess i am one of those who can't, unless I have family commitments elsewhere, i mean out of state etc. If not, I guess I am available 24/7.
I wish things like family relationships can be as easy as it looks. Some things you can't explain, why some people react differently to what one sibling is saying or doing. A simple statement or email can be so wrongly interpreted by someone else, its hard to fathom. But I guess I won't try to find out why ...let things be...let them have their say and for me, better to leave things unsaid. Cos words once spoken cannot be taken back. Then there will be the awkwards moments when you meet cos of what has passed between, either face to face or via email. Some siblings don't talk to one another etc...I guess it happens in every household at some time or other. It happens in mine, now and then. But blood is thicker than water..and soon all will be well again. I mean how long can one keep the grudges, how long can one feel the hurt and the anger, as long as it takes you say, well, yes time heals they say, but to forgive and forget is another. At any rate, suffice to say, I won't be losing any sleep on it cos' my conscience is clear... some days, it's easier to just forget and not say anything about it at all. In this case, I really can't figure out or explain it and so I am leaving it at that! Well, then again, some things are better left unsaid.
Office politics is another thing I won't be drawn into. There's the usual gossip and I will not be drawn into it. I try to do my best and expect others to do theirs as well. I also expect that work done must be completed on time and done correctly at the first time. I also expect meetings to be planned in advance and executed accordingly. I also expect respect and decorum shown during meetings where and when it should be accorded. at any time, the chairman of a meeting must be accorded proper respect. Out of the office, it's different, one can be friends I often say outside the office but during office hours, there must be respect shown, a superior and co-worker and staff under your supervision. I just hope everyone realises this without it being displayed or talked about.
Well, that was my week. I am looking forward to what's in store..since the Boss is back.
Have a good week.
Cheers!
Thursday, January 7, 2010
2010 is here....where am I?
Happy New Year.
We are well into January...2nd week to be exact. What have I been doing? I think for the first time in my life... I didnt make any NY resolutions. Wonder why? I have been busy as usual towards the end of the year. There was the trip to the APEID-UNESCO Conference in Hangzhou China, wish we had more time to explore, then the year end X'mas festive break and by golly, before I knew it, the NY was upon us...but I suppose if I wanted to, I could find the time to make a list. I did consider the fact that after years of writing down new resolutions and pondering over the previous year's list, I decided it doesn't really matter if I made a list or not this year. Over the months I forgot what I had written down and in the end, it did not serve any purpose for me. I suppose I could refer to the list now and then but then again, it was not important. The list was usually the same: lose weight, stop ageing, as if I could, be a better mum, daughter, wife, sister etc. perform better at work...the list goes on. I think over the years, I have achieved what I wanted to. Maybe if I had to make just one resolution, it would be to be more committed towards finishing my PhD. My daughter now cracks jokes that she will be graduating before me and she has another three half years to go before she qualifies as a doctor. So where am I?
Excuses, excuses, excuses. Gosh! I do hate procrastination and I seem to be caught in its web.
The funny thing it doesn't happen where my office work is concerned. I consider that taken care of very well. Ask my staff. My personal studies is the one I keep on putting off and basically, in the end its my personal satisfaction if I finish it anytime soon. Wish me luck.
I hope and wish that 2010 will be a better year for everyone.
Cheers
We are well into January...2nd week to be exact. What have I been doing? I think for the first time in my life... I didnt make any NY resolutions. Wonder why? I have been busy as usual towards the end of the year. There was the trip to the APEID-UNESCO Conference in Hangzhou China, wish we had more time to explore, then the year end X'mas festive break and by golly, before I knew it, the NY was upon us...but I suppose if I wanted to, I could find the time to make a list. I did consider the fact that after years of writing down new resolutions and pondering over the previous year's list, I decided it doesn't really matter if I made a list or not this year. Over the months I forgot what I had written down and in the end, it did not serve any purpose for me. I suppose I could refer to the list now and then but then again, it was not important. The list was usually the same: lose weight, stop ageing, as if I could, be a better mum, daughter, wife, sister etc. perform better at work...the list goes on. I think over the years, I have achieved what I wanted to. Maybe if I had to make just one resolution, it would be to be more committed towards finishing my PhD. My daughter now cracks jokes that she will be graduating before me and she has another three half years to go before she qualifies as a doctor. So where am I?
Excuses, excuses, excuses. Gosh! I do hate procrastination and I seem to be caught in its web.
The funny thing it doesn't happen where my office work is concerned. I consider that taken care of very well. Ask my staff. My personal studies is the one I keep on putting off and basically, in the end its my personal satisfaction if I finish it anytime soon. Wish me luck.
I hope and wish that 2010 will be a better year for everyone.
Cheers
Friday, December 4, 2009
....its December
wow...its that time of year again. Tis' the holiday season....school is out...older kids having exams...shopping malls filled with lovely X'massy decorations...and the odd feeling that the year is coming to a close and the new year's just round the corner.
Then..its time to reflect on what important events took place this year, wow..what a year it has been...too early to reflect..no not really..I will just list here..else it might take me some time to get back here to write . For me, it has been a whirlwind kind of year...the biggest event would be my dad's passing, followed by my mum's second major operation...my PTK exam, my two kids' major exams and then going to China.
Its' been a year of emotional upheavals, sometimes tension -tied and sometimes pleasant memories. 2009 is a year that I will remember always. Personally...it has enlightened me once again to the fact that we are all facing death as a certainty, that life doesn't owe us anything, we have to make the bets of it, someone once said: when you fight life, life always wins. So we just have to go with the flow.
I would like to say for myself that 2009 was an interesting year. We learn from events that happen, (by the way, we are supposed to do that by studying history not repeating it), we grow richer emotionally and spiritually, internally as a person, we change ourselves to adapt to what is happening around us. yes we all want to change for the better. I hope I have ...
All the best for 2010...
Cheers.
Then..its time to reflect on what important events took place this year, wow..what a year it has been...too early to reflect..no not really..I will just list here..else it might take me some time to get back here to write . For me, it has been a whirlwind kind of year...the biggest event would be my dad's passing, followed by my mum's second major operation...my PTK exam, my two kids' major exams and then going to China.
Its' been a year of emotional upheavals, sometimes tension -tied and sometimes pleasant memories. 2009 is a year that I will remember always. Personally...it has enlightened me once again to the fact that we are all facing death as a certainty, that life doesn't owe us anything, we have to make the bets of it, someone once said: when you fight life, life always wins. So we just have to go with the flow.
I would like to say for myself that 2009 was an interesting year. We learn from events that happen, (by the way, we are supposed to do that by studying history not repeating it), we grow richer emotionally and spiritually, internally as a person, we change ourselves to adapt to what is happening around us. yes we all want to change for the better. I hope I have ...
All the best for 2010...
Cheers.
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Thank God for modern medicine
Hi all,
Great news for us all...and definitely for mum.
Thanks to my brother who managed to get the pain-killer medicine for her..yes. she went in for the procedure a week ago today and walla...the pain she had all these months have been greatly reduced. Now she can stand up and sit down with little or no pain...her knees still hurt and she still has problems walking but most important the pain is incredibly less. Thank God for modern medicine. Now mum is happy and cheerful and that helps us all. She is still lonely...why not dad is not around but at least her days are now almost pain free and that makes us all happy as well.
We hope it lasts but my brother says it will only last for three months and she has to get another injection. Well, until then...we hope mum will be comfortable and less stressed.
Cheers all.
Great news for us all...and definitely for mum.
Thanks to my brother who managed to get the pain-killer medicine for her..yes. she went in for the procedure a week ago today and walla...the pain she had all these months have been greatly reduced. Now she can stand up and sit down with little or no pain...her knees still hurt and she still has problems walking but most important the pain is incredibly less. Thank God for modern medicine. Now mum is happy and cheerful and that helps us all. She is still lonely...why not dad is not around but at least her days are now almost pain free and that makes us all happy as well.
We hope it lasts but my brother says it will only last for three months and she has to get another injection. Well, until then...we hope mum will be comfortable and less stressed.
Cheers all.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Updates
Hi all,
Just updating all... been busy like anything...
For the last few months...moving to a new department, sorting out the sector's workload, the getting the Kem Membaca 1Malaysia ready for the launch. Then it was the Hari Raya celebrations, so things slowed down some what...and before I knew it, the PTK exam came up...just ended last Friday..what a relief! Basically, it was more a mental kind of exercise...getting the tugasan ready, then undergoing the weeklong oral and written evaluation. Phew..what an experience...guess I wont be hitting any more books anytime soon.
Now am busy, getting ready for my presentation at the APEID-UNESCO conference in Hangzhou, China. This is in the middle of the month so busy, busy, busy.
Work at the office continues..I was just making a checklist..and yes..you guys at the office..we have almost 30 items on our list to finish before end of the year. Let's get cracking...
To the family...thanks for getting it all together while I have been busy.
Oh yes, i must congratulate my better half for completing his hike up Mt Kinabalu over the weekend. You did it! So for all of you at the 50yr range..get going.
Oh yes, October 25 came and went..that was my late dad's 80th birthday..if he had been alive today. Anyway, we all hold our own special thoughts for him. And yesterday being All Souls day, we were at the cemetery for a visit. This is our yearly visit and a chance for family to get togther and clean the family graves, light some candles and decorate with flowers. Guess this period of time brings out the feeling of mortality in all of us.
As for mum, well, she will be going in for a checkup this week...we hope the doctors can help alleviate the pain she is going through . We pray for the best.
Cheers.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Of achievements and awards...
Yes, it's great to be recognised at last for your sacrifices and hard work. Two weekends ago, about 159 officers from BTP and its branches all over the country were treated to a dinner and given certificates of appreciation in recognition of the excemplary perfomance last year. Yes, yours truly was one of the recipients.
It was a happy occasion and all receipients dressed in their best, to walk on stage and receive their certs from our deputy Director General of Education and our own Director. Yes, 18 August 2009 will be a date to remember. That nite also saw the launch of the Patriotic Month...if you didn't know, that would be from 16 August to 16 September. We sang the famous Sudriman song, Tanggal 31 and waved our Jalur Gemilang. Yes, it was a nite we would all remember.
Talking about awards...some deserve it and some, they say dont't deserve it at all. The APC has a history behind it too. The award is given to deserving candidates who have shown their good work during the year. Too often then not, the award is give to those closest to the top heads of depts, seniority and those who haven't got it before. So sometimes even when you deserve it, you won't get it, cos' you need to be recommended by the bosses. And there are often cases of cronyism and favouritism. I have learnt to be patient and just do my work...somehow...I feel you will be recognised for what you have done all these years, besides..how many cronies can they give to, with passage of time, everyone will get it at least once or twice in their civil service career. By the way, according to rule, candidates are eligible every three years and when they change grades, but then again rules are meant to be broken and challenged. I have got it twice so far, once in 1994 and then 2008...imagine, a total of almost fourteen years in between. Even working in different places and giving your best at all times doesn't guarantee one anything. Guess it doesn't help that some bosses think that one should only get it once and give the APC to others who haven't got before even if that officer has just started work for a year! But I shall let all that talk about fairness and justice slide...Thank God my previous boss thought I deserved it, after all these years.
Let's not even think about the awards that are given out yearly by the states and federal governments. Again, each year, we get hundreds of JPs, AMNs, AMPs, JMNs, Datuks, Datos', Tan Sris etc. Some are suggested candidates who deserve the awards, some are chronies, some are armchair supporters, some are new politicians, and some buy the awards...that's what we hear, but I'd like to think that everyone who gets an award at state or federal level really deserves it. It bugs me though why some people get almost the same awards every year, I mean, some of these Datuks/Datos' get a few Datukships! Why? It beats me. Suffice to say, giving of such awards must be based on merit and for those who truly deserve it, nothing else.
As for me, the APC means a lot. At last, after 14 long years, and serving different bosses and different departments, finally, someone felt I deserved it again. I will continue to do my best, without expecting any reward...cos' when you don't expect it, it's sweeter when you do. And when you don't get it, you won't be so disappointed. So here's to all those deserving candidates, congratulations and continue to do your best. Life is making the most of what it has to offer.
Cheers.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
